The Meaning of Tonglen

Tonglen (གཏོང་ལེན།), sending and receiving. Tonglen is a meditative mind practice in Tibetan Buddhism. In Tibetan, tong means to send and len means to receive or take.

It trains the practitioner to heal their own mind and to generate compassion for others by mentally exchanging their own happiness for the suffering of others. The practice is designed to reverse the habitual tendencies of the ego, shifting the focus from self-absorption to cherishing others.

By reversing these egoistic tendencies, the heart becomes more open and flexible, allowing one to cultivate compassion to bear or heal suffering such as disturbing emotions and illness.

There are two primary stages of Tonglen, which are Tonglen for oneself and Tonglen for others.

In terms of duration, there is no fixed length of time. One may practise for 5 minutes, 10 minutes, half an hour, or even an hour each day. The most important thing is to be consistent and to maintain the practice at a regular time, whether that’s in the morning or in the evening.

The first practice: healing the self.

Regarding the first stage, Geshe Chekhawa said, “Begin the order of practising the taking with oneself.”

For beginners, it is often difficult to immediately take on the suffering of others or give away one’s own happiness. Therefore, Geshe Chekhawa advised beginning the practice with oneself. This involves bringing one’s own future suffering into the present moment as a training ground.

By first inhaling one’s own suffering, the mind becomes prepared to eventually take on the suffering of others.

The second practice: compassion for others.

Regarding the second stage, Shantideva wrote, “If one does not truly exchange one’s own happiness for the suffering of others, Buddhahood will not be achieved. And even within samsara, there is no happiness.”

This verse explains the core principle of Tonglen. Clinging to one’s own happiness while ignoring the suffering of others is the root of suffering. Genuine exchange is the path to liberation.

This stage is deeper because it extends the self-practice. Once you become comfortable working with your own suffering, you gradually extend that compassion to others, whether that’s a person or even an animal, such as a suffering dog.